The idea for this week’s newsletter started when I saw that viral trend where people ask ChatGPT: “If you were the devil, how would you keep someone from being successful?”
It got me thinking. Out of the ten success-sabotaging tactics, two stood out - the ones that have wrecked me the most.
Make discipline feel like a burden.
Make them expect quick results.
And damn, have I fallen for these. Even now, I catch myself slipping.
Yes, I know. “Consistency is key.” We’ve all heard it a thousand times. It’s the motivational quote of the century.
But if we KNOW it, why do we keep ignoring it?
I had to ask myself that a lot lately.
While preparing for this topic, I started thinking back: When was the last time I did something for a long time without seeing results?
I couldn’t remember. And that scared me.
It made me realize that every time I got to a certain point—when the hype wore off, when I wasn’t seeing the validation I expected - I quit.
I quit when I reached the Valley of Despair - the third stage in the emotional Cycle of Change.
A quick dive into how this cycle goes:
Uninformed Optimism - The start. Excitement. Big dreams. Energy through the roof. No idea how hard it’ll be.
Informed Pessimism - The honeymoon phase ends. Reality sets in. Challenges appear. Doubt creeps in.
Valley of Despair - The hardest part. No results. No motivation. Frustration. Most people quit here.
Informed Optimism - The tipping point. You’re not seeing massive success yet, but momentum is building.
I was stuck in Stage 3 - over and over again.
And I had been looking at everything the wrong way.
I realized that my expectations were my biggest enemy. I was doing things because I wanted results. If I put in work, I expected an immediate return.
And when that didn’t happen? I started to judge myself.
I lost momentum.
I started wondering if I was wasting my time.
Maybe you feel the same way. You’re showing up, doing the work, but nothing seems to be happening. And honestly? That already puts you ahead of most people.
But still, doubt creeps in. You start to wonder… what if I am wasting my time?
So here’s the real question: Why are you even doing this?
What’s more painful - sticking with it, even when it’s tough, or quitting now and dealing with the regret later?
If the answer is the latter, then first - you just answered that you really want this. You have a deep want in your life. CONGRATULATIONS!
Yes, really clap for yourself. Don't take for granted that you actually want something.
As I am in the same position, I will say what I have learned and how I try to look at things.
Here’s the shift that changed everything for me:
I started to look at the process as the result. The action is my reward. Be grateful that you have the ability to take action.
You’re already doing what matters. If you didn’t truly want it, you wouldn’t still be here.
So what’s the alternative? Sitting around, waiting for motivation to magically appear?
The pain of quitting is always worse than the discomfort of staying in the game. And if you stay, you’ll start to see what is called the Bamboo Effect.
I had to redefine what results meant for me.
I stopped looking for visible progress. I started trusting in the Bamboo Effect - how bamboo grows underground for years before suddenly shooting up. Just because you don’t see the growth yet doesn’t mean it’s not happening.
I mean, if you are doing something, you are getting better. Even if you don’t see it, you are. That’s simple logic, right?
If you know that you are growing and in fact you want to grow at the same time, why stop?
If you know you're not growing, and deep down, you don't want to grow where you are - then maybe it's time to pivot.
I also started giving myself pride in private victories—the things no one sees. The reps I put in. The habits I built. The fact that I showed up when I didn’t want to.
This was very important to me. I categorized my private victories as tasks, not goals.
You can’t cheat the game. What you put in is what you get out. Maybe not today. Maybe not next week. But eventually.
You just gotta be patient and aligned with your tasks.
So how do we keep sane through this process?
Track small wins. Write down the actions, not the outcomes. You can’t “do” a goal, but you can do the work that leads to it.
Reframe success. Stop chasing quick results. Start seeing the process itself as success.
Talk with yourself. Expect the lows. Plan for them. The Valley of Despair isn’t a dead-end. It’s part of the path.
Be two steps ahead. Know that after the hardest part comes the turning point—Stage 4: Informed Optimism.
That’s where everything changes.
That’s when momentum starts working for you instead of against you.
That’s where skills improve.
Confidence grows.
Success feels within reach.
And the only way to get there?
Keep showing up. Even when it feels pointless. Even when nothing seems to be happening.
Because the results aren’t missing. They just aren’t visible or material at this point. But they are there.
And so, we all know the drill, right?
Consider this your sign to keep going. Because if you quit now, you’ll never know just how close you were.
I hope this was a quick reminder for you that you are doing great and keep on pushing <3!
As always, something for you... This one hits hard after reading this.
Billy Joel - Vienna
All the love, Niklāvs
